Message from God to jupiter on 10/6/2005 12:25:37 PM
Wanted: Web Developer/Programmer/System Admin/Network Admin/IT department in a box. Must be idiot who'll work for inder $10/hour forever at a company that swears it's going places. Must know everything. [Sales/HR/Billing/Quoting experience a big plus, as we'll be losing our Sales/HR/Accounts Recievable dept soon to another job, not that we know that yet.]
You will be administering 4 production servers(1 Windows, 3 Linux), 1 Linux devel server, 1 office network, 5 Windows desktop computers, an underutilized VoIP phone system, and god-knows-what-else. You will also write crappy boring repetitive websites in PHP and MySQL until you wish you could do anything to avoid the monotony.
Must be trustworthy even though we'll do no background check, as we'll be giving you all the root passwords on your first day. Being able to deal with dickheaded bosses, rules and requirements is a must.
Apply now! We're waiting for you. Please? Pretty please?
(Actual interoffice memo sent to me after the tech resigned his position, surprisingly there were no lies in the message)