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Stupid Client Quote #6165

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me | posted 04-16-2008 | Number of Votes: 153  |  Current Rating: 4.62   

I worked for a design/manufacturing company that made a certain product. If I mentioned the product I would be sued. It was "ran" by a husband and wife. The husband was the president, the wife was the vice president. These are direct quotes from them:

VP: "We've done a complete 360 from our intended direction."

VP: "Its like trying to hit a moving bullet."

Regarding a product that takes 3 months to fabricate.
VP to customer: "We'll have it ready and shipped in two weeks."
VP whispers to science director: "how are we going to do that?"

After doing three 18 hours days, back to back, I sent the new design to our "marketing" dept for review (?) and noted the deadline to ship to customer so they would understand its urgency.
VP Email: "Please allow at least one week for marketing to select aesthetics."
Marketing: Her son
Aesthetics: What color to paint the box

Customer: "Whats the price?"
VP: "Were in a fast paced industry where costs are a matter of speed and efficiency..." lectures for 15 more minutes.
Customer: "Thanks for telling me what you wanted to say. But whats the price?"

Pres: "So the basic idea is a flash light with a flexible arm on the end so you could essentially hang it anywhere"
Me: "You mean like a Snake-Lite"
Pres, blinks for a minute: ".......No."

Pres: "So we are changing the company name but the acronym will stay the same so we wont have to worry about people getting confused. Besides, Id give anyone $100 if they could tell me what 3M or IBM stood for."
Me: "Minnesota Mining & Manufacturing and Internal Business Machinations"
With a straight face, Pres: "See, thats confusing"

I was the only mechanical engineer at the company and did all the 3D drafting. After mentioning I had to go because I was due in a meeting to review the new CAD software.
VP: "Why do you need to be involved?"

Also had to argue that it was better to send the drafter, me, to the included training as opposed to her son, the graphic designer. On the training date he was out of town at a car show so I got to go.

After sitting through a 2 hour meeting with a new customer who had a list of questions about the product they were considering buying.
VP: "Its like we have to prove we deserve their money?"

Customer called and said he opened the case and found a 10 milli amp fuse in a circuit that supplied power to a 20 milli amp component.
VP whispers to us: "Is he allowed to do that?"

To another engineer that would bring a calendar, filled with his tasks and deadlines, to production meetings. VP:"I'm tired of you using that calendar as an excuse to say your busy"

I know it sounds like I work with Dilbert, but these are the truth.

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